Welcome To Afterhours – One Jelloshot Per Person

What’s up everyone? It is my pleasure to wholeheartedly welcome you, yes Y-O-U reading this right now, to my first-ever weblog. It will include a sometimes-witty, an oftentimes-mean, and an always-fun interpretation of some things I wish people would just take more notice of around this sometimes-, oftentimes-, and always-nonsensical campus. Jews driving in their MLs on the Sabbath (oy), Asians eating at other restaurants than on Dryden (soy), chain smokers outside of Olin (coyugh, cough), and me…just taking it all in (oy). Ya know, everyday I see things and have encounters with people that just boggle my mind. I am not just a victim of circumstance, but a victim chance. I always seem to be in the right place at the wrong time. Jerry Seinfeld once said that “the whole concept of lunch is based around the tuna sandwich.” (Source: http://www.chickenortuna.com/snacks.php?page_code=109…Yes I cited, chill the fuck out Cornell.) Not only do I agree with him, but I think that the whole concept of humor is based around a common agreement towards the many ridiculous aspects of life. My goal is to bring such aspects to the table, especially the ones that I feel are much too often underappreciated by you, the reader. (I will concede, nevertheless, that these said aspects may just be overappreciated by me, and actually not funny at all.) Be that as it may, I happened to have been blessed(?) with an incredible sense of observation, which, though often detrimental to my mental health, will hopefully provide a chuckle or two for yours. Some call me a) cold-hearted, others b) mean, and even more c) just a funny guy, but I’ll let you decide. (You can only choose 1 of the above.) Whatever you think of me, you’re welcome to stop by whenever you’re in need of some Firestonenlightenment, or are just plain bored of reading Takenote on your adderall binge. Read, laugh, cry, or don’t. See if I care. Either way, I’ll be C-in’ U Around.